About Allan
Allan Herem is a licensed marriage and family therapist with 23 years of clinical experience. He focuses on stress, anxiety, relationships, parenting concerns, low self-esteem, and depression. Allan aims to make sessions straightforward and practical for people feeling overwhelmed.
He helps people unpack difficult feelings like abandonment, emptiness, guilt, and shame. He also addresses problems that show up in close relationships - communication problems, commitment worries, infidelity, and divorce or separation.
How Allan works
Allan pays attention to family of origin issues and fatherhood concerns when those shape current struggles. Allan uses evidence-based therapeutic techniques tailored to each person’s needs. Sessions focus on concrete skills and clearer communication so daily life becomes more manageable.
He works at a steady pace, balancing direct feedback with a calm, respectful tone. People often come to him for help with caregiver stress, control issues, impulsivity, and the fallout of past hurts. Allan aims to help clients rebuild trust in themselves and others, and to find practical ways to reduce anxiety and depressive symptoms.
He encourages small, sustainable steps that lead to better functioning. Allan practices in California as an LMFT, which means he is licensed to provide marriage and family therapy in that state. Conversations are conducted in English, and his approach is collaborative and solution-focused.
What Allan works with
The areas below are the ones Allan selected when setting up a profile. The first few are listed as the main focus; the rest are also named.
- Stress, Anxiety
- Relationship issues
- Parenting issues
Also listed
- Abandonment
- Attachment issues
- Caregiver issues and stress
- Commitment issues
- Communication problems
- Control issues
- Depression
- Divorce and separation
- Emptiness
- Family of origin issues
- Family problems
- Fatherhood issues
- Forgiveness
- Guilt and shame
- Impulsivity
- Infidelity
- Isolation / loneliness
- Jealousy
- Life purpose
- Men's issues
- Midlife crisis
- Money and financial issues
- Mood disorders
- Self esteem
- Self-love
- Social anxiety and phobia
- Workplace issues
- Young adult issues
Training and background
| Register | LMFT |
|---|---|
| Years in practice | 23 |
| Languages | English |
| Session format | Online: video, phone, live chat or messaging |
| Country | California |
Memberships and registers are shown as supplied; they are not licences, and this directory does not verify them.
Online support options
Evidence-based approaches and online care
Allan draws on evidence-based therapeutic techniques to help people with stress, anxiety, relationship strains, and low mood. One approach focuses on improving communication and conflict skills so people can speak clearly and reduce repeated arguments. Another approach targets attachment and abandonment wounds by helping people notice patterns, name emotions, and practice new responses that feel safer. These methods are practical and aimed at day-to-day improvements.Finding the right approach is part of the work. Allan treats the selection of methods as collaborative and will adapt techniques to match a person's goals and preferences. He checks in about what feels useful and adjusts the plan as progress and needs change.
Online therapy is offered through video calls, phone sessions, live chat, or text-based messaging to fit different schedules and needs. Video allows face-to-face conversation and visual cues, phone sessions are useful when bandwidth is limited or a shorter check-in is needed, and chat or messaging can suit brief updates or people who prefer typing. These options make it easier to fit therapy into work, childcare, or other daily demands while keeping focus on practical change.
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Common questions
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A practical next step
Write down two things you would want to be different in six months. That is the most useful thing to bring to a first session, whoever it is with. If you would rather start now than keep reading, online sessions are the quickest route.
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